Building Your Support System: How Therapy Can Help You Connect with Others During Postpartum
If you’ve been waiting for a sign to (re)build your community, here it is. I often emphasize that having support during postpartum recovery is one of the most effective ways to prevent challenges like postpartum depression, anxiety, psychosis, and bipolar disorder. But, don’t just take my word for it. Research over the past 30 years consistently highlights that social support—whether from friends, family, or online groups like Facebook Mom groups—is essential for mental well-being during and after pregnancy.
However, you may be struggling to lean on your community.
Maybe you dread reaching out to friends and asking for help, or perhaps you find vulnerability difficult and don’t know where to begin. Or maybe you’ve been keeping things from your community, and asking for help would mean being honest about a lot. If you’re like many of my clients before starting therapy, you might worry about feeling like a burden, fear rejection, dread being seen as “weak,” or suspect that your vulnerabilities could be used against you (because maybe they have been in the past). If this sounds like you, therapy can be a powerful resource to learn how to (re)build your community and protect your mental and emotional well-being during postpartum recovery.
Therapy Can Help You:
Reconnect with your favorite version of you…
Because “best” is overrated. Therapy can help you rediscover a version of yourself you may have felt disconnected from since pregnancy or having a baby. Maybe you once loved traveling, watching musicals, or making unique cocktails. Therapy supports you in reconnecting with these interests and finding ways to incorporate them into your new life, whether through local resources, online communities, or support groups. In therapy, you’ll work on balancing your “two worlds”—old and new identities—while meeting like-minded individuals who can relate to your experiences.
Overcome your discomfort when asking for help
For many, asking for help can feel uncomfortable but is crucial for a healthy postpartum recovery. As Kemi Nekvapil explains in The Gift of Asking: A Woman’s Guide to Owning Her Wants and Needs Without Guilt, common reasons people avoid asking for help include fearing judgment, rejection, being seen as greedy or arrogant, (not) getting what you want, or feeling like a burden. We often imagine scenarios where asking for help leads to disappointment or embarrassment, sometimes giving ourselves a “no” before anyone else has the chance. Yet, as Nekvapil writes, “…if we create a sense that we can do it all alone, we will find ourselves alone.”
Therapy can help you identify beliefs that prevent you from asking for support, clarify what you need from your community, and develop comfort in relying on others. You’ll also learn how asking for help can strengthen relationships (for example, by making your needs clear rather than expecting others to guess) and practice techniques to improve communication.
Improve communication skills and set boundaries
In my opinion, therapy is the best place to improve your communication skills. A therapist, such as myself, can help you understand the pitfalls in your current communication patterns and identify areas where misunderstandings or conflicts arise. Through role-playing and reflective exercises, therapy can enhance skills such as active listening, assertiveness, and expressing needs clearly. After graduating from therapy, you’ll know how to communicate openly and directly with your community without feeling resentful, angry, abandoned, ashamed, guilty, or disconnected from them during your postpartum recovery.
Setting boundaries is another essential focus when learning how to build your community in therapy.
Regardless of whether you struggle with saying “no” or feel uncomfortable asserting your limits (e.g., due to fear of rejection or guilt), you’ll develop the confidence to establish boundaries without feeling overly responsible for others’ reactions. This is particularly important during postpartum as you learn to understand your new needs, limits, and abilities. Over time, improved communication and firm boundaries can lead to healthier, more fulfilling relationships and a greater sense of self-respect that will last long after postpartum recovery.
Final Thoughts
Building a supportive community during postpartum recovery can have a profound impact on your mental and emotional well-being. Therapy offers a safe space to reconnect with yourself, learn to ask for help, and improve communication and boundary-setting skills. By addressing these areas in therapy, you’ll foster deeper, more satisfying relationships with those around you and build a support system that is more likely to fulfill your postpartum needs.
Start Working With a Postpartum Therapist In New York, NY
Whether you’re navigating new challenges, reclaiming your interests, or learning to lean on others, therapy can empower you to create a community that nurtures and sustains you well beyond the postpartum period. Lavender Therapy can offer support in cultivating these bonds. You can start your therapy journey by following these simple steps:
Contact me today to meet and learn more.
Learn more about navigating postpartum challenges via my blog.
Discover how therapy can help you find relief from worry.
Other Services Offered with Lavender Therapy
I am happy to offer support with a variety of mental health services in addition to therapy for postpartum anxiety and depression. Other services offered include therapy for burnout, therapy for women, family planning therapy, and therapy for pregnancy loss. You can learn more helpful info by visiting other blogs or about page today.
